Poser Worship

fake "But an hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for such people the Father seeks to be His worshipers. God is spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth." John 4:23-24

How often do I truly worship God in spirit and truth? This is the worshiper that God desires, and I wonder on a daily or weekly Sunday basis if I truly worship God in the fashion He seeks from me.

I may, if I am really on my game some days, worship God with my mind as I think about the things of God and this by no means is non-worship, but can I say I have engaged my spirit in moments of worship?

Have I allowed the very heart and core of myself be engaged to and with my worship? Have I been able to lay aside distraction and noise for even an hour on Sunday or a few minutes throughout the week for worship so that my spirit might fully engage with God, who is spirit?

Before I ever sit, stand, or arrive for worship have I prepared my heart, spirit, and will for worship? Can I pray beforehand with John Baillie, "God, grant me, I pray you, a clearer vision of your truth, a greater faith in your power, and a more confident assurance of your love."

What then of worshiping in truth? Can I say I have worshiped God in truth? When I worship God on a daily or weekly Sunday basis, do I do so in alētheia (truth), more than a factuality, but in sincerity? More than fact-checking the words I say, but can I say my heart is sincere in its worship?

I desire to be the sort of worshiper God seeks. That an all-knowing God must seek anything makes the thing he seeks truly hard to find. [Tweet That]

God, may you seek and find a sincere worshiper in me. May I worship you in spirit and not only in mind or empty words. May I not wait until Sunday but know that today and with my whole life I am to give you honor and praise from my spirit to yours with sincerity and honest desire.

Allow for struggle

Some of the best thoughts come through struggle. God honors our struggle and despises our tepid, lukewarm droning.  We are not preschoolers who walk straight lines attached to a rope.  God honors the honest struggler.  There are too many Christians trying to find life through soothing their soul, but true passion is brought forth in honest struggle.  Our wrestling match with God is pregnant with passion and confidence. Because God will ENFOLD AN HONEST STRUGGLER IN LOVING ARMS.  The good news is that hatred of God and others decreases as Christ takes the heart inch by inch, but it comes only through honest and passionate struggle with God.  We may be a new creation, but we are not a perfect creation.  The war over hatred and sin may be won ultimately, but the battle to replace hatred with love will be over only when we see Jesus in flesh.  We can and will be angry with God, but have to be honest without reserve.  We must understand the Holy Spirit will not allow a bottomless cup of anger to exist, and most often the heart will be engulfed in love when we are honest with God.

Peculiar Trust

Trust is a peculiar thing to understand and even more difficult to live out.  Trust is difficult because it requires honesty most of us are not used to.  In order for me to trust, I must be willing to be honest fully.  I must be willing to present the reality of myself.  This honesty involves everything and not just honesty about the things that are easy and pleasant. This means my emotions are included.  It means when I am angry, hurt or sad, I have to be as honest as I am when I am thrilled.  If I am willing and able to be honest with these things, I am able to really trust.  If am not able or willing to be honest with Tonya when I am angry or saddened, I do not trust my wife.  If I am only fully honest with Tonya when everything is great and thrilling while hiding away my frustration or pain, I do not trust my wife.

How then do we trust an invisible God?  How then do I learn to trust a Heavenly Father?  I suppose the question to answer that question is, "How honest am I with God?"

When I am frustrated and angry with the circumstances of life, why am I praying without the cursing and fury in order to remain reverent even in my anger?  When I am terrified and stressed  about a big life decision I need to make, why am I praying pretty "if it be thy will" prayers?  When all the world feels against me, and I am down and out, why are my prayers absent?  Why are my prayers only passionate and heart-felt when I am thanking God for something?

Why? Because I do not really trust God?

I do not trust God enough to be angry with him or my circumstances.  I do not trust God enough to bring myself bedraggled and broken and absent of piety.  I do not trust God enough to simply be honest with my worry and stress.

If I am unwilling to just be honest with my pain, anger, worry, and hurt, I do not trust God enough to be thrilled and thankful.