who am I

Through the looking-glass [self]

There is a social psychological concept called the looking-glass self that essentially breaks down to theorizing we become more and more what the most important person in our life thinks we are. You have seen the popular memes online reflecting what different people think we actually do for a living!

In life, there are many people who have different perceptions of who we really are. Exes are going to have a different perception of you than your momma. Co-workers are going to have different perceptions of you than your spouse.

The looking-glass self theorizes that we will often so strongly believe that we actually become the person the most important person in our life perceives us to be.

This brings up a couple vital questions:

1. Who IS the most important person my life? (and why is it not God?) Before you answer, realize we give certain people importance in our lives. Moreover, the most important person in our lives is not always the most 'positive-impact' person in our life. For many people the most important person in their life might be the abusive parent, and that impacts how that person really perceives himself. We may give too much importance to the person we are dating who perceives you as the one make him feel better, and she begins to believe she is only exactly that.

If you are a believer, this first question necessarily proposes a second question. Why is God not the most important person in your life?

Of course we say He is, but theory is different than practice. Can you honestly say (not on this page, but in your heart of hearts) that your relationship with Jesus is THE most important relationship you have and maintain? Can you say that God's perception of you is who you really are, or are you really becoming who some other person perceives you to be; someone to whom you have GIVEN more importance than God?

2. Who does God perceive me to be?  If God is the most important person in our life and our relationship with Jesus IS the most important relationship we have, then the second question to answer is "WHO does God perceive me to be?"

Let me give you a couple verses to think of this.

1 John 3:1 is my favorite verse in all of scripture. "How great is the love the Father has lavished on us that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are." Do you believe and KNOW YOURSELF as a child of the perfect Father who loves perfectly?

In John 13:23, the disciple calles himself "the one Jesus loves." What would change in your life if you actually believed enough to BECOME 'the one Jesus loves'? What needs to change for you to peer through the looking-glass and see what God sees?

Identity Control and other thoughts on who I am

The truth is that when I am in control of my own life, I end up being very destructive to myself and others. This is why it is very important for my life to be directed and controlled by God. But the problem is that I give control over to other things and people when I allow other things and people to determine WHO I AM! I realize in my head that these things cannot make me who I am intended to be, but I still find myself living differently. These things may change who I am on the outside, but they have nothing to do with who I really am. What I do comes out of who I am. How much do I realize God's love for me? God loves me and cares about me. He has a plan and purpose for my life; all the other things I use to determine who I am are false. All the other things I have attached "my self" to are "idols". I have attached my identity, "who I am", to other things than God and have, in so doing, created idols.

My true identity, who I really am, is God's beloved. I have to claim my identity solely with that realization. IF I were able to do that perfectly, I would have given God complete control of my life...