Sit and allow

Child,

I am not here to speak to you.  You are not here that I might teach you something.  I ask you to be restful right now.  Be silent and quiet.  I do not ask you to do this so you may DO anything else.  I am not going to speak to you.  I merely ask that you are silent and just LET ME LOVE YOU.  Just be still and drink in my love.  Don't sit and think too heavily ABOUT my love.  Just sit quietly in my lap with your head on my chest and just let me love you.  My love is not an ideal, a theology to study.  My love, right now, is my action.  I am LOVING you.  Just be still in my arms and just let me love you.  Be still and drink in the love that radiates around you RIGHT NOW only awaiting your silence...your stillness to fall on.  If you are not still, you will only rustle it about.  But if you are still, my love will pour upon you like snow in a globe.  You CAN BE covered in my love, but you must be still and allow me to rain down on you more love than you will ever be able to contain.  Don't think!  Don't listen for me.  For I have nothing to say to you right now.  I only have something to give you.  I have only to love you right now.  Rest and BE LOVED my wonderful child.

My evangelistic fame

Have you ever spoken a word of the gospel to anyone at my workplace? In my imagination, I see an interview about my evangelistic fame. I REALLY saw my past coworkers respond, “Huh?  PC? Famous for WHAT?  Well, I don’t know….PC was a great guy.  I mean I knew he was a Christian, but he didn’t come in here preaching or anything.  He was pretty cool about it.  He knew I was an alcoholic, and he still laughed with me.”  “You know,” says another, “now that I think about it; I can remember times when the store was crazy, and PC kept working hard to help where he didn’t really HAVE to.  I don’t know how many times he helped us in a bind.  I never noticed it then, but in retrospect, that guy really did work hard.”  “Yeah,” chimes another.  “He knew my husband was killed in a car accident last year, which left me to raise 2 teenagers alone, and PC listened to me every time I was stressed by kids, pained over my loss of companion, or just tired of work.  You know what?  I really think he cared about what I was going through, and I think he shared the joy somehow.”  Similar stories go around in this hypothetical interview of my coworkers.  Then the journalist goes to the coffee shop I ALWAYS go to.  He talks to ALL my friends and family…Christian and NON-Christian.

After its over the imaginary article reads, “PC Walker was an evangelist.  PC writes in his book, “Christians are so devoted to speaking the gospel (God's love) to or at people instead of living the gospel toward people.” (pg. random #, see footnote).  His living out of the gospel reached more people than all the sermons he ever preached, more than any book he has ever written."

I hope that, in reality, I will be remembered by everyone I will have moved on and left in my past as a man who lived the gospel better than he preached or wrote it…..

Thoughts on Turning the other Cheek

"Turn the other cheek" is one of those commands Jesus gave that I find very challenging. I tried it in high school, and I was jumped and beaten greatly. I do not look back on that moment and think, "Yeah! I was obeying Christ and THAT makes it all worth it." Still not an easy thing to grasp.

Until recently reading an account of Ghandi. Not a declared Christian, but not exactly a declared ANYTHING while being a studier of EVERYTHING. He was a man of peace with outrageous respect for the teachings of Jesus. Upon facing a gang of people with a Christian pastor, the pastor turned to run for safety, and Ghandi stopped him inquiring, "Doesn't the new testament say turn the other cheek." The pastor, flustered, said it was a metaphor. One of history's greatest icons of peace says, "I don't think it is. I think Jesus meant to stand and take the blows, and take courage. Not to retreat, but not to attack either. From this, the other will eventually have respect for your courage. For you will not strike back but nor will you be turned away. I think Jesus grasped this, and I have seen it work."

There is a large part of me that wants to echo Ghandi's reflection. Some part of me that desires peace and righteousness and still manly strength so as not to back down. Could it really be that by turning the other cheek we are actually taking on more courage and eventual respect than we would by either retreating or attacking? Maybe Ghandi didn't read John Eldridge and his peaceful tactics weren't exactly 'Wild at Heart," but like most of Ghandi's actions and claims, we don't have to agree with any of it, but we definitely should take them as ideals to provoke our thought. What say you?

When God is silent

When God is silent, do not frantically search for answers. Only continue your regular time in His Word and know the Spirit is in the process of helping you understand what God is doing in your life.

One of my favorite interactions with Jesus is that of Mary, Martha, and Lazarus. I love the idea that Jesus, knowing He is going to raise Lazarus, still waits and weeps with Mary and Martha. What enormous compassion! He did not need to weep with them. He knew he was going to resurrect Lazarus in just moments.

But something else strikes me today. Remember when He waited to go until after Lazarus had been dead for 4 days already? He shows up and Martha says, "Jesus, if you had been here, my brother would not have died." (John 11:32) Here is something to think about: I think Jesus could have said, "You're right! If I had come when you asked, your brother would not have died."

She knew Jesus would heal him. After all, she had see him heal time and time again. It is as though he was saying, "You would not have come to know me more and deeper than you are about to know me. You would not have been prepared for an even greater revelation of me than you had already known."

God's silence in our lives means He is prepared to bring into your life an even greater revelation of Himself than you have ever known. When God is silent, start watching for what he is about to teach you about Himself. This will require faith, trust, and anticipation.

Paying attention to prayer answers

Here's the thing about God's answers to prayer: he always does.

I just miss it for lack of attention. When I pray with some intentionality, I should immediately anticipate God's answer (whatever it might be). Most often, though, I pray and immediately forget about what I was praying about. I forget to then look for how God may be answering that prayer. I ignore and miss all the unusual things about my day. I see them as menial or distracting, and fail to connect them with the activity of an omnipresent, sovereign, omniscient God I had JUST spoken with.

When I pray I need to immediately begin watching and listening to what happens next. Be prepared to make adjustments to MY plan. The thought that God is not going to answer my prayer should never cross my mind.

God actively answers, I just rarely stick around to notice.

On Reconciliation

Reconciliation is impossible without looking at myself and saying, "I don't want it to be this way.  What do I need to change about myself to see things heal?"

Reconciliation has to begin with me approaching myself with the willingness to change.  Reconciliation will NEVER happen if I expect the other person to change.  Changing myself starts reconciliation.  Changing the other person (if it were even possible) is control and only spawns more distance and hostility between the two parties.

This does not mean I should be willing to change myself and expect them to change in return.  It means changing myself simply because I don't want it to be this way in MY heart.  I can only change my own heart and HOPE for a willing change in theirs, but not EXPECT a change.

What do you want from me?

How often I've asked and heard this question asked? In its various forms, the question is our heart's scream to know what or what more God wants from us?

More and more, I believe the answer comes down to one thing.

Jesus replies, "Love the LORD your God with all of your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind. This is the greatest commandment." (Matthew 22:37-38)

As I am daily ambushed by God's outrageous love for me, I am more and more convinced that seeking God's will for my life is the wrong search. But I should search for His will in my life, and His will is the same as it has always been.

He wants you to love Him with all that you are. Your experiencing God depends on you having a sincere and real relationship of love. I am more and more convinced that this is more important than any.thing.else in your life.

Every decision, big or small, everything in your Christian life, everything about knowing God and knowing His will is fully dependent on the intimacy of your love relationship with God.

If this lynchpin is not in place, nothing...nothing in your life will be right.

Random prayer of grace

"I am your child.  I quit trying to MAKE myself presentable to you and instead trust that I AM presentable to you despite all of the things that are just parts of a sinful nature around me.  I move on in that passage and believe, 'if I confess my sin, you are faithful and just and will purify me and forgive me' because again, you only see your child here, and I need not be plagued by sin OR guilt.  I mean is not guilt the actual issue here?  Not sin.  I mean sin is just inevitable, but what IS of choice by me is whether I will allow guilt to plague me and keep me from seeing myself as your child instead of seeing myself as this horrible person.  You're so much quicker to forgive me than I am to forgive myself.

Enough

I remember praying the words of Switchfoot from the very sincere depths of his heart,

"Let me know that you hear me. Let me know your touch Let me know that you love me. Let that be enough."*

I listened to the song and prayed it sincerely almost 5 times on repeat from my home to the church.  I sat in the parking lot, BEFORE church already preparing my heart in honesty with a basic cry, "God, please let me know that you hear me.  I don't ask you to solve my problems, my anxieties or my fears.  I merely pray that you let me know that you hear me."

There are times we thirst for and grow parch for lack of God's presence.

I remember worshiping and singing to a God I knew loved me, but whom I had needed to just BE with. I remember standing to worship again and choosing to only mouth the words and let them really speak and scream from my heart,

"You're all I want... You're all I need..."

* Let That Be Enough by Switchfoot

When we and my daughters are in the way

I was installing floating shelves in the bathroom the sight of daddy's tools draws my daughter "I want to help, Dadda!" By this, she means, "I want to see what you are doing, and be where you are." She began to take tools away from my work space She picked up necessary screws and hardware

She is not helping. She was in my way. But my love would not turn her away

Jesus said, "My Father is always at work...the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do ONLY what he sees His Father doing...For the Father loves the Son and shows him all He does." (John 15:17, 19-20)

My God, I know you are at work around me all the time. While I realize I am only going to slow you down and get in your way I trust that you love me and purposely show me what you are doing. I want to join you. I want to be a part of what you are doing and be where you are.

Listen up, Soul

Soul, I will address you as the Psalmists do. Oh my soul within me, why do you continue to focus on the discouragement, shame, and self-defeat? Why do you not focus on Jesus and the rest he gives to you? (Matthew 11:28-29) Why do you believe the lies of the Imposter within you? Listen to the truth of Jesus' words, come to Him, and he will give you rest.

In Jesus, you find your rest. In Jesus, you find rescue and refuge from your troubles. In Jesus, you will find rest you crave and desire. Oh heart within me, you are under the weight of defeat, and you need rest. Only in Jesus will you find rest from self-defeat, hopelessness, and shame. Listen up, soul! You need rest! Only when you are focused on Jesus will you not be be focused on the destructive lies and inner-dialogue.

Oh my soul, come to Jesus this morning [and tomorrow....and the next day], and you WILL find rest.