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My Top 10 Posts of All Time

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All is Grace by Brennan Manning [a review]

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This was the most difficult book I could not put down. This book was discovering that his or her alter ego anchors every soaring super hero. It was finding out Santa Claus pees and poops just like I do. Brennan Manning used to be my hero.

You are going to hate this book if you are looking for an account of the profound things done by one man in God’s name. You will not find here the account of a faith powerhouse who, with shear grit and discipline, followed God flawlessly.

You are going to love this book if can accept that God’s love for you is ridiculous and entirely impossible to comprehend or define. You will find here a beautifully broken picture of this love we all want to taste, but it is not an orthodox portrayal for you to study.

The writings and teaching of Brennan Manning have been a slow IV drip when my reliance and trust in Abba’s love have dehydrated. They have also been shock paddles to my heart in emergency moments when I am flat lining under the weight of shame, temptation, and failure.

I first heard the word ‘ragamuffin’ in 1999 in Brennan’s book The Ragamuffin Gospel. It ravished my aching heart. I came to understand God’s grace and furious love in a way I had never taken hold of in my life.

The ragamuffin is one with a singular prayer: “God, be merciful to me, a sinner.” Brennan explains further in All is Grace: “any additional flourishes to make that cry more palatable are pharisaical leaven.”

The ragamuffin is one who understands that he, along with every other person, is a beggar at the door of God’s mercy. She is the one who is bedraggled and beat up in life and faith, but have learned to take the hand out of grace without regret or allowing shame to hold them back.

Revealed in this book are all the brokenness and pride, the shame and the wounds, the arrogance and failures that lie behind all the books and accolades. Brennan takes large risks in a tell all memoir, but he would clarify in other books that trust is no trust at all without risk. The amount of risk taken in this book reveals with just how much trust Brennan has fallen on the love his Abba.

One of my favorite poets, Buddy Wakefield defines forgiveness as “the release of hope for a better past.” This book reveals the hope of forgiveness. You see a hero forgive the unforgivable others in his life, namely the unforgivable within himself.

Your heroes will do all they can to keep you from seeing the sad and broken realities behind the capes. Brennan Manning used to be my hero, but this book has made him far more of a hero than he ever was.

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j73mYgpxhTY&w=560&h=345]

My 51st Psalm

God, Have mercy on me, a sinner.  I was born a sinner and continue to return to my nature.  My sins are before me all the time, and they trap me with enticing power.  I know my sins and they have wedged themselves between you and I.  You have the right, the power, and ability to leave me behind because I have hurt you too many times.  I have driven disgusting wedges between us with my sin, and I deserve for you to leave me behind in my sinner’s silt.

Please do not leave me behind.  Please show me mercy and grace because of the love you have been known for.  Please do not remove yourself from me.  Please do not turn your back to me as I deserve.

You desire right living, wisdom, and holy living from me, and I often fall short of your desires for me.  Please forgive me and forget those disgusting things I have put between us.  I cannot separate myself from your LOVE, but I can separate myself from YOU.  Please remember your love for me and help me close the distance my sin has created between us.  Reunite us by erasing and deleting the sin I have placed between us.  If you forgive me, I will be truly forgiven.  I will be free to live in love with you.  If you close the sin-gap I’ve created, I will be reunited with you; the greatest lover of my soul.

My heart is clogged with sin, and it has affected my ability to relate with you clearly and unrestricted.  Please remove the restriction between the two of us, which keeps our hearts disconnected.  My guilt and shame remain; even after the sin is removed and forgotten.  So restore my heart to joy.  Restore my heart to its fullest ability to love you back without shame and guilt.  Help me sustain that clearance of heart.  Help me keep my heart clear of sin, shame, and guilt so that I can love and live for you fully and freely.

Only you can do these things in my heart.  I am nothing, and only you can repair my spirit.  Only you can repair my heart to its fullest potential to love and live and relate to you (and others through you).

I stand before you now…broken down…and fully dependant upon you.  Sacrifice is just a way of showing and proving my commitment to you, and my brokenness is the only sacrifice you will accept and respond to.  Please hear my cry!

- St. PC of the Broken and Repentant

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Entangle: Re-write a psalm in your own words.

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What do Willie Nelson, Chipotle, and Coldplay have in common

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I came across this video today, and I really like it. Willie Nelson covering a Coldplay song is reason enough to love this video, but the concept of the video (sustainable farming) is fantastic as well. Enjoy! (I did) [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMfSGt6rHos&w=560&h=345]

Things my biographer should write

Only a short time into the book of Numbers, there are two statements I've read numerous times, which have not escaped my mind. "So Moses did as the Lord commanded him."

AND

"Moses and Aaron fell face down on the ground."

Both Moses and Aaron are leading large groups of incredibly obstinate and stubborn people, and during all the whining, struggles, and frustrations, these are two very common responses from Moses and Aaron.  On countless occasions you see the Lord give Moses a command for his next move as the leader (often decisions and commands which will inevitably anger and frustrate the people), and the next statement in the text is, "So Moses did as the Lord commanded him."  It is written so simply in our Bibles, but that statement represents a very significant action.  Moses was incredibly obedient to God when commanded anything of him.

Those commands were never simple, but the simple presentation of his obedience in scripture shows the great devotion and dedication of Moses.  That is phenomenal, and I really need to take a great challenge from that.  How obedient of God's commands on my life have I been?  Would someone be able to write my biography and write, with confidence, "So PC did as the Lord commanded him"?

Well I am not so sure this person would be able to write of me that I frequently heard from God enough to actually do as He tells me, which brings up the second statement.

Each and every time anything came before Moses and Aaron, there was this second statement quickly following: "Moses and Aaron fell face down on the ground."  Generally, once they were berated by their own people for having done what the Lord asked them to do, this statement followed.  Often when circumstances came their way and HUGE decisions needed to be made, this statement quickly followed.  Nearly every time, that statement would be followed with, "The glorious presence of the Lord appeared to them..."

As a leader, a husband, a man...I wonder if my biographer would be able to write of me that I was quick to "fall face down on the ground" once presented with difficult circumstances and decisions.  Actually, no, I don't wonder at all!  My biographer would NOT be able to write that statement of me; at least not frequently enough to indicate a pattern.

This makes me wonder if I could change the course of my hypothetical biography from this point forward...

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Get off my lawn

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These kids today and their:- skinny jeans - epic fails - lacking knowledge of Tommy Boy or Chris Farley - video games - social media (okay, I like that one) - Jersey Shore -  waning respect for printed books -  flat billed hats - sushi - high "connection" without face-to-face relationships - iPads (jealous) - Justin Beiber, Kardashians, Lady Gaga, and other "celebrities" - energy drinks - autotune - boat shoes (and other styles I am too old to 'pull-off' now, but would if I could) - hooking-up - _________________

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Current Music Obsession: Ben Sollee

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Generally speaking, there is always an artist or band I am obsessed with. I.just.can't.stop listening to this artist all the time. The last obsession I would say was Listener, and before that was Mumford&Sons. Right now, I am working on a strong obsession with Ben Sollee. I saw him on NPR's Tiny Desk Concerts a few weeks ago, and I was stricken. He is a cellist and vocalist, and he is both with an outrageous amount of soul. Enjoy with me!

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5fd9Z7zJVg&w=420&h=345]