Where'd you guys meet

Poetry got me married. I was a member of Novus Dux. We were a group of guys dedicated to service and various other things.

There were a lot of things we did together with our sisters in  L’Amifidel. The connection between Novus Dux and L’Amifidel was pretty strong.  As a result, we would periodically have days set aside dedicated to serving the L’Ami girls.  We asked all the girls to wear their T-shirts as we didn’t know ALL of them.

The goal throughout the day, whenever you saw a L’Ami girl, was to serve them in that moment.  Most of the guys resorted to the easy way out by opening doors or taking up their bright orange lunch tray.  I chose a more interesting path…more creative…more...tenacious?

I went to the library to check out a few books of sonnets and various other poetry and went out to The Valley. I sat in a patch of grass with books at hand, and at first glance of a L’Ami T-shirt, even if it were the length of the valley, I would recite poetry from the books in my most dramatic fashion.

At one point, I looked up and saw a stunning blond girl walking toward me in a blue T-shirt with the yellow letters ‘Alpha Episilon Pi’. I saw her from a distance, and I flipped quickly to “a good one”, and knelt down. I screamed as loudly and dramatically as I could. I didn’t even know her name. She gave a wry smile and eventually a hearty laugh at my idiocy that was both ridiculous AND charming.

Years later, that stunning blond would be my best friend through our 5^th year of college when we started a dating relationship for a year before getting engaged to be married.

We are frequently asked the common question, “Where did you meet?” It wasn’t on a road trip with friends.  It wasn’t a shared mailbox. It wasn’t a magical Freshman Hike moment.

She would be sure to let you know it was on a day when he read me poetry loudly and inanely in The Valley at Anderson University.  Poetry got me married!

* this is a snippet from a piece I wrote for our alumni association at AU. So it does assume a reader who knows AU

Intervention: just say no

This is an intervention for:

those who still search their iphone with their index finger, guys wearing uggs, church-goers using terms like 'touch' 'birthing' and 'skin on Jesus', people who hold their cell phone on speaker phone in the car (this is not "hands-free"), people who put apple stickers on their PC, those who order an extra wet cappuccino (this is called a latte), those who ask strangers to watch their stuff while they run to a coffee shop bathroom (what am I gonna do about it), whoever keeps buying Nickelback albums...

....STOP!

#becauseweloveyou #doesnthavetobelikethis #imafriend

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Who else needs an intervention?

Potential Suns of Suffering

"Believers in humble circumstances ought to take pride in their high position. But the rich should take pride in their humiliation--since they will pass away like a wild flower. For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich will fade away even while they go about their business." -James 1:9-11

Remember the tone of this entire chapter is in light of suffering, and the idea presented here is one of roots.

Suffering and trials and troubles, like the sun, are potentially dangerous and destructive, but they have equal potential for light and growth.

Our suffering and our trials have the potential to create destruction in our lives, but they also have the potential to help us grow and refine the person we are.

Like plants under the sun, the issue at hand is how deep the root runs, so is our suffering. If our root is shallow and dependant on our riches or other things, we will wilt away under the scorching heat of suffering.

But if our root runs deep into the richer soils of humility, family, and Christ, the suns of suffering will come, but we will find beauty and growth from the Light.

the best things

You are the best choices I plucked from all the bad ones

what does it mean to mean something [poem]

A podcast told me to take the time to sit down with friends and tell them what they mean to me. Immediately, I was inspired to do so. I wanted to sit down with good friends. I wanted to let people know what they mean to me, because no, we do not do that enough.

My next thought was to determine who I would sit down with. I did not get far on that list. By 'not far' I mean 'nowhere'. I knew with immediate certainty I must begin with the one person closest to me.

Not often enough do I tell my wife what she means to me. Not often enough do I make her aware that she means the very most to me. Not since college have I written a poem for the love of my life.

No one else may know what they mean to me until my wife is certain of what she means to me.

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What does it mean to mean something to someone

Not many remember your meaningful words Not many remember your meaningful actions

Not many forget how you make them feel

What you mean to someone is the glossy bottle of feeling you leave them with

You make me feel I am better than my worst mistakes

You make me feel gratuitous grace can be torrential

I mean to make you feel a fraction of these

My Students' Blogs You Should Read

A cluster of my students keep blogs where they share various reflections and expressions. The old adage goes that teachers often learn more from their students. This is certainly the case for me. More often than not, I feel like I'm just riding in their wake. You should check out the blogs of my students      and    learn something.

* these are listed in order of post frequency

SARAH S creative.inspiring.inquisitory

LORI infectious.creative.fragrant

SARAH K ASL.deliberate.picturesque

GENEVIEVE haunting.overt.unpolished

TINA conscious.downright.grace-ridden

SARAH K visible.unguarded.endearing

SHELLI incremental.touring.debrief

SPENCER worship.rogue.question

A Walk A Day Keeps Dr Phil Away

Vocational ministry gives me unconventional days of the week off. Mondays are my day off at this point, and the life-explosion of fatherhood transfers "days off" to "daddy days". Not to rub it in for my midwestern friends and family, but the weather has been gorgeous the last few weeks. I have been making certain these days are very intentional, and that has meant taking walks with my daughter.

Though she is only 5 months old, these moments are free, and I would pay money for them if I had to. Some part of me thinks these moments are what will keep me off Dr. Phil's 'Horrible Dads' episode 16 years from now.

Maya Angelou made me do it

"I've learned that people will forget what you said. People will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." -Maya Angelou

This quote has been on my mind a lot this week.

I am made to reflect on my interactions a bit. I am made to pay closer attention to the people I come across in a day. I am made to change my outlook on relationships I maintain. I am made to realize how much energy and time I have wasted trying to get people to remember things I've said or done. I am made to see my wife differently. I made to see my students, my barista, and you differently. I am made to approach my enemies differently. I am made to ask a lot of questions I have never asked. I am made to self-evaluate the way I treat myself.

Brennan Manning wrote, "In conversation, the disciple who is truly poor in spirit always leaves the other person with the feeling, 'My life has been enriched by talking with you.'"

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What things would change if you believed this statement?

When I Will Worry [poem]

His television told him to worry, and he wanted me to worry with him. My lacking concern worried him more.

“We are in a recession; in case you were unaware.”

After an educational statement of the American economy demise, he asked me when I was going to begin worrying.

I answered:

I will worry when our dogs do not dress and eat better than most of the world

I will worry when I do not water my lawn and flush my toilet with life saving water

When we are not playing survival games in countries where people live for money they will never see

I will worry when this country learns the difference between “entitled” and “privileged”

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What would you add to this poem?

The True Gospel of Influence and Image

Without looking, which stories in the gospels stick out to you as they have influenced your life the most? It is an interestingly telling question and approach to the gospels. I like the question because it reveals a few things.

INFLUENCE - it tells of your largest influences, but further, it tells of which stories you remember well enough to retell with adequacy and passion. Simply, the question reveals influence.

IMAGE - It is also telling of your strongest image of Jesus, and thus, of God. It may not be the only image, but it is likely your most prominant and relational image of God.

For me: Without looking, the prodigal son pops out immediately. Then comes Mary and Martha, the adulterous woman, and then the cross.

There are a few questions that reveals for me: What might these stories reveal about my prominant image of God? Why does the cross NOT come first? Shouldn't it?

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Without looking, which gospel stories stick out to you as the most influential on you?

When Suffering Becomes Sinful

I have been taking a very slow walk through the book of James. Coming to it nearly a verse per day! Though my personal time is at James 1:4 right now, I am still thinking a lot about 1:2.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds."

A stronger look at the word "trials" has revealed more than ever really noticed before. It comes from the Greek word pierasmos and it means "putting proof to". It is a sense of testing...it is a sens of temptation. Some translations actually read 'temptations'.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters when you face temptations of many kinds."

Now we cannot get too far away to forget the sense we originally understood of trials being similar to the difficulties, struggles, and tensions we face and here and now. These are suffering! We are not to think the author did not mean suffering or trials.

What we need to understad is that our suffering is temptation.

When we face trials, struggles, difficulties, and suffering, we are being tempted. We are facing pierasmos. We are being put to proof.

Regardless of the circumstances, when we are tempted, we are not sinning. It is when temptation places in front of us a decision whether or not to obey God's command's and we choose not to that we sin.

Now again, remember, our suffering is temptation.

When we are suffering, we are faced with a decision. We may choose to obey God's command in response to our suffering (which is to choose joy) OR we can choose sin and disobedience (which would be bitterness, anger, pity, etc.).

Each moment we face suffering or trials, we are being tempted, and we would do well to look to God and his Word for wisdom in what reactions and decisions to make in those moments.

It is not easier a temptation to face than lust, greed, or pride.